On Skepticism vs. Belief re: otakukin

If we’ve talked about spiritual matters you’ve probably heard me say I am a skeptic. Whether you believed me or not was probably influenced by where the conversation was before that point. This entry is sort of about skepticism, and sort of about belief. I urge you to read it.

Let me first say that this is emphatically NOT a ‘surprise I’m a troll’ post. While that would be kind of funny, it wouldn’t be true. Its also not an ‘I’ve realized I was wrong all along, my eyes have been opened’ post. My view of things is the same today as it was yesterday. This is about what I believe, and the way in which I believe it.

What do I believe?

I believe that if it is possible for a person widely thought of as no more than a fictional character to have a soul, and it is possible for us to have souls, then it is possible for people to be reincarnations of them. I believe that if there is an objective entity ‘Ken Ichijouji/The Digimon Emperor, I am/was objectively that entity.

I believe that if there is no such entity, (or if it is impossible to have souls at all), then Ken Ichijouji/The Digimon emperor is simply an idea. And if he is an idea, then I am as psycologially and emotionally close to that idea as it is possible to be. My mind lives out that psychological paradigm, whether that is healthy or unhealthy. It’s just how my mind works.

If we live an ‘atheist’s world’ I am as wrong and as right as everyone else (excepting atheists of course). But what if its not an atheists world, its just a world wherein people don’t have the souls of anime characters. Maybe its say, a world where Christians are right, or Buddhists, Wiccans, Scientologists, take your pick. Now I’m a little bit more wrong, but no more so that the people of myriad other belief systems that may turn out to be untrue. Again, I am living a psychological paradigm that while not objectively real, is real and meaningful for me.

I’ll probably never know for sure what cosmic worldview is correct until I die, and even then if the atheists are right, I won’t know, I’ll just pffft. (The upside is if they’re right, the atheists don’t get any time to gloat)

What if Christianity is right? Well, which brand? I guess I can live (exist?) with a god that really is all loving/all forgiving or at least reasonably so. But, if I get damned to hell for lying, cheating, kissing girls, eating shrimp, not being baptized, or just not kowtowing to this entity enough–

It’ll come down to what hell is like. If a ‘loving god’ has a pit of eternal torture where the Devil is in fact Good’s prison warden, you can bet I’ll be grabbing a posse and storming the gates of an unjust universe. I have my personal rebellion all planned out. 😛 Worst that can happen (hell) is already happening, right?

I don’t have time to go into the personal implications of the realities of many other religions right now. Thankfully, the most I have to worry about from them is generally giving being born another try.

I have another belief that is impacted by the question of whether there is a correct mystic paradigm.

My belief that I am a servant of Xelloss, who, while is physically apart from me, still has continuing (or rather on and off) communication with me.

It is my most firm belief, that if any sort of spiritual creatures exist in the universe, that I am in real contact with one who has at the *very least* chosen to allow me to identify him as Xelloss for purpose or purposes unknown.

I believe that he is a representation of the ‘dark faction’ or whatever spiritual struggle might exist in the world, and that he has taken me on as a follower, whether in this lifetime, or as I believe, previous to it.

He may be a demon, keeping my soul from the ‘one true god’, he might be an Archon, or a Djinn, or the angel of a dark pagan deity. He might be the god Loki. He might be anything.

But he serves a dark purpose and I serve him.

Of course, if there are no spiritual entities of any kind anywhere, then he is rendered into my personal psychological crutch, but this simultaneously renders everyone’s gods into the same, and I can at least allow myself some cruel vindication.

-Mordax

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