I was hesitant to post this on tumblr, because I know the notes would turn into a shit show, but I’m tired of the fetishization (in the actual meaning of the term) of doms.
I’m tired of the way people talk about doms as scary, aggressive, cold, etc, and the way they’re treated like little more than machines that exist to dispense satisfaction to subs.
Doms are routinely talked about in a way that strips them of their humanity and reduces them to a prop in submissive fantasies. Which is totally cool when you’re talking about fantasies, and fiction. But not cool when you’re talking about the actual people participating in your romantic and sexual life.
Please remember that doms are romantic partners. Sexual partners. Friends. Doms are people who also require intimacy, trust and affection, and who have their own limits and squicks.
Doms are not just scary props.